The holidays are a time of joy, fun, reflection, and family. When you think of the holiday season, you picture family and friends gathering, cooking, laughing, and exchanging gifts. If you are in a romantic relationship, the holiday is a magical season where you and your partner can enjoy festivities while holding hands, kissing, and annoying single people around you. However, the holidays can be a trying time for some people who do not have a healthy family life or live away from their families. Being single and in a foreign country during the holidays can be very lonely, and some people, especially women, can suffer from depression because being alone on the holidays is tough. Plus, being away from your family and a sense of normalcy can deepen that feeling of being alone and lonely.
I have been single for 25 years of the 26 years of myself on earth. I only had one Christmas when I celebrated with a boyfriend, and even that was uneventful. Holidays, especially the Christmas season, have been a semi-triggering experience. My family does not mark the holidays. This year will be our first year having a Christmas tree only because I am forcing my family to do so. Most Western Christmas traditions have not persuaded my mother to adopt them in our family. Outside of going to church and buying each other gifts, we have never gone above and beyond to celebrate Christmas.
However, the Americans in me crave that Christmas magic. I create my own Christmas traditions that I do mostly by myself. Over the last few years, I have been abroad, away from my family. Living abroad as a single woman during the holidays helped me start new traditions I always dreamt of. Traveling and living abroad helped me realize my holiday fantasies as a single woman. Being able to enact the traditions I always wanted never made me feel lonely, and I found being single a personal way to take care of myself and find the things I like and would like to do in the future when I have a partner. Here is how to celebrate holidays abroad as a single woman.
- Decorate your house
The first thing I do during the Christmas holiday to feel the season is decorating my house. I do a Christmas cleaning. I buy Christmas decorations and leave the lights on. As a single woman who spends five holiday seasons away from family and without a partner, I find decorating empowering and liberating. Bringing your living space alive, decked with lights and candles, rejuvenates your life. Your living space feels new, and you look forward to returning to that fresh Christmas smell.
Although your house is a haven, it can be lonely for some single women. Not having someone to come home to and being alone after a long day without someone to call or text can be daunting. Many singles don’t like to go home and face their realities. Sleeping alone can trigger some people. Some single woman experiences their dark times in their house. As an extrovert who is always “on,” when I get home, I crash and burn because I use all my energy to please people. Therefore, when the holidays come, it is vital to revamp your living quarters. Decorating your apartment abroad helps you feel better, and you get to do what you love during the holidays with your family back home. By trimming and making your living space ready for the holidays, you ensure you come home to a place of peace and joy.
- Check out Christmas Markets
The second thing I enjoy doing during the holidays is going to Christmas markets. The first time I went to a Christmas market was in Europe. Before going to Europe, I did not know it was a thing in my hometown. However, after visiting the Christmas markets in Rennes, France, it became my favorite way to pass the time. As a single person, exploring different shops and buying things for myself is one of my most empowering things.
Christmas markets allow you to ring in the holiday season, see new vendors, try different foods, and shop for yourself. Other Christmas markets give you further opportunities to see various things. The live music makes the event feel more welcoming. You do not need to be with a partner to enjoy this holiday festivities. It is also a way to care for yourself and lose yourself in the Christmas spirit.
To find information on Christmas markets’ openings and durations, check the news and flyers around the city or at the city hall. If you are in Europe, check out Saturday markets or street markets. Christmas markets will likely be at the exact locations.
- See A Show
One of the Christmas traditions I have started is going to different shows around the Christmas holidays. In 2019, I saw Chris Tucker live at Providence Performing Center. I booked a ticket when WWE is in town for their December shows. Going to the theater has become one of my holiday traditions. I do not go to the theater, but with the Christmas holiday being a good time for events, I have made it a point to see things I would not usually see.
Being abroad during the holiday season gives you the perfect opportunity to enjoy things you never imagined. Imagine watching the Nutcracker in London or listening to the Opera in Paris. How about enjoying a Christmas concert in a small town in the South of Italy? Being single and abroad during the holidays does not have to be boring or lonely. There is so much you can do and see with the freedom that traveling and being single grants you. Seeing a show is a perfect way to enjoy life and bring joy to yourself. It is the ideal way to love yourself by gifting a magical experience.
To discover places to watch shows, check the news, flyers at the city hall, or entrainment establishments like the cinema or the Opera House. Make sure to do research and check events online. You can also go to the Office of Tourism to find information, and you may also find some discounts to attend events at a reasonable price.
- Call Family Members & Friends
Another way to combat loneliness and celebrate the holidays abroad as a single woman is by reaching out to family and friends back home. Being away and physically alone does not mean you do not have a robust support system. Sometimes, we focus on the things or the people we cannot see and fail to recognize that although our support system is not physically with us, they are still there. We should reach out to them. With the improvement of technology, distance is irrelevant. You can call your friends and family and keep up with the local news and gossip. You can host a family Zoom call where you gather with your loved ones and catch them up on life abroad, what you have been doing, and places you visited. This way, you feel like they are part of your journey abroad. You get to introduce your family to different things and traditions.
When I lived abroad, I felt like I took my mother with me. I would video call her to show her around Paris, Brussels, Brugge, or Rennes. I would send her pictures of the food or clothes I bought in real-time. Including her in my time abroad made me feel like I was not alone. It was also a way to bond, and being abroad brought us closer. When you are single and abroad, keeping up with family and friends helps you feel surrounded by your support system.
- Go on a Date
Another thing you can do during the holiday season abroad as a single woman is to join the dating scene. Going on dates and having different dating experiences abroad is fun. Traveling allows you to explore unfamiliar things, and dating is one of them. Through dating, I realized what I like in a relationship and what I do not want. When I dated while living abroad, I did not put pressure on myself to be perfect or present a persona I am not. Dating abroad allows you to appreciate different dating cultures, meet people who do not want to spend the holidays alone, and start a romance for the ages.
- Take a Walk
Of all the sports, walking is my all-time favorite. I walk 10k steps a day. Although I rarely hit my goals in my hometown, I consistently surpass them when I am abroad. Walking is a healthy sport and allows you to unwind and destress. I love taking a walk after a long day at work.
During the holiday season, walking takes on another goal. Walking lets you unwind. Being surrounded by Christmas displays and decorations lets you enjoy the Christmas season. Window shopping around the Christmas holidays and going in and out of cafes are two ways I spent my holidays abroad on my walks. Walking alone is romantic. You do not need to rush to get to a specific destination. You take turns and detour and lose yourself exploring the city.
One of my best walks during the holidays was at the Champs Elysees. The famous Parisian streets decked with Christmas ornaments and lights provided an atmosphere that I still play in my head. It was the best act of self-love I gave myself. Next time you find yourself abroad, don’t be afraid to take a walk. It might end up being a walk to remember.
- Watch Christmas Classics
One of the signs that Christmas has begun is with the holiday movies. One way to ring in the season is by pulling out all of the Christmas classics. Some of my favorite classics are the “Home Alone” movies. It is ironic to be abroad alone in your apartment, not knowing many people in your surrounding area, and watching a film about being home alone. However, I love it. Watching this classic takes me back to my childhood when I first watched it with my younger brother. The movie makes me laugh and allows me to live in the moment.
Watching your favorite movies takes you away from feeling alone, single, or the negative feeling of sometimes being a foreigner. It is a way for you to connect with yourself, and it is a homemaking process. It is a way to bring your sense of normalcy to your new environment. It brings back old memories and creates new memories. Watching the things you like without distractions or interruptions is a way to focus on yourself and relive the things that bring you joy.
- Cook Your Favorite Food
One of the best ways I care for myself is by cooking. Cooking is a form of love because you create an art that is supposed to feed you and contribute to your health. Although I enjoy cooking for others, I feel more empowered when I cook for myself. I love trying different recipes. I use my mother’s recipes while creating my recipes. When I cook, it’s a whole vibe. I play Christmas music and pretend to be the next Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston. Then I play Congolese Rumba, which always makes me happy and reminds me of home. When I finish cooking, I set the table and make sure I give myself the luxury I would give if I were hosting or cooking for others.
During the holiday season, I also try to bake. Throughout the year, baking is not on my mind, but during the Christmas season, baking is a part of the Christmas holiday. Therefore, I read Christmas cookie recipes while cooking and try to bake. Some cookies turn out good, and when I fail, there is no one to judge me or know about it. It becomes a funny story I tell my friends about later.
- Invite People Over
Another way to celebrate the holidays abroad as a single woman is to invite the people you have met or even friends from your hometown. You have certainly met a few acquaintances if you have been abroad for over three months or traveled because of school or work. Therefore, you have a certain level of trust to invite them to your apartment and have a potluck-style dinner.
Being single during the holidays does not mean you have to be lonely. Some of us don’t feel lonely in our city or country because we have family and friends. We have people around us who fill the void of not having a romantic partner. Having a community of people with whom we can share a meal, go out to the movies, or invite over to our place contributes to our mental health. It diminishes the negative thoughts surrounding being single.
Living abroad should be the same. Utilize the network you make from school, work, or club to create your community while living abroad. During the holiday season, invite them to eat food with others. Create the atmosphere you would have if you were back in your hometown with family and friends. By inviting people over and hosting a party, you are sure to enjoy the holiday season.
- Go on a vacation.
My favorite thing to do in another country is travel to other parts of the country or another country. Exploring different places is one of the best ways to spend time abroad. When your area starts to feel mundane, travel to another city. Visit cultural sights. Travel to neighboring countries.
I spent my weekends in Paris when I lived in Rennes, France. I visited the Chateau de Versailles and Eifel Tower and explored every shop on the Champs Elysees. After I felt like I saw everything there needed to see in Paris, I traveled to other parts of France. I went to Normandy, in the south of France. I visited other cities in Bretagne, like Saint Malo. I went to Germany, Monaco, and the Netherlands.
Traveling and embarking on new adventures during the holidays when you are single diminishes the feeling of loneliness. Seeing a new sight distracts you and helps you to focus on what is in front of you. You busy yourself with wanting to explore the new environment, try fresh foods, take pictures, and enjoy different Christmas traditions.
In conclusion, celebrating the holidays abroad as a single woman can be an empowering and liberating experience. Decorating your living space, visiting Christmas markets, and attending shows or events are great ways to get into the holiday spirit and create new traditions. As a single woman, it’s essential to take care of yourself and find ways to enjoy the holiday season, even if you’re far away from family or don’t have a romantic partner. By embracing new experiences and creating your traditions, you can make the holidays a joyful and meaningful time, regardless of your relationship status or location.
Until next time, happy holidays!
xoxo,
Cy
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